Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Michael Barnes and I’m coming to you today with a very special announcement.
I have had a vision. It was a dream, really. In this dream, I was playing an apparently endless game of DESCENT with Matt Thrower, Franklin, and Ubarose. Mr. Skeletor was the overlord. Robert Martin was flying around the table in one of those LOOPIN’ LOUIE planes saying “this game sucks” every time he passed us by. All of a sudden, a mighty figure from out of our collective unconscious burst up out of the table, scattering hundreds of cards and health counters everywhere.
CONAN THE BARBARIAN.
He held in his hands neither a Hyborian sword nor a comely Cimmerian wench…in his right hand, a white cube. In his left hand, a green cube.
He spoke in the voice of a god. Or at least a
“Vhat are you dooing? You must go aught and dezine a game. Do not waste tieme! Get into zee choppa!”
Then a helicopter crashed through the ceiling like at the end of the Lamberto Bava picture DEMONS. We got in. The helicopter flew through time. I checked my watch and it was a year from today. The chopper landed and we got out. It looked like we were in
This mandate? For a game collectively designed by the FORTRESS: AMERITRASH readers and writers to win the Spiel Des Jahres. What better way could there be to show those turkeys that anyone can cobble together a handful of “clever” mechanics and dress them up in a family game and win international fame, fortune, and acclaim at the same time? Folks, if this works we’ll all be ordering our 2009 Lamborghinis next June. And the dominance of the Eurogame will finally be laid to rest once and for all.
So here we go…add your suggestions/rules/mechanics/artwork/whatever to the comments here…I’ll start us off the AT way with a theme and some box copy text. Ladies and Gentleman, I give you...
MILK AND PICKLE.
In 17th century Bayern, nobles are willing to do anything to sate their hunger for milk and pickles- The players represent the freewheeling milkmongers and picklers of the village and must do their best to impress the nobles with the delicious flavor of their wares. But watch out! If those gluttonous nobles ingest both milk and pickles, they’ll run to the balcony to expunge a nasty mix of brine and curd on their followers below. Of course, no resource can be wasted in trying to impress the nobles so the players must gather the glop and try again!
It’s a taste you’ll never get out of your mouth!
MILK AND PICKLE is a clever family game of cleverness for 2-5 milkmaids and master picklers age 5-99.
So have at it! F:AT for SDJ ’08!