Sunday, 23 September 2007

Deep Thoughts on Games by Ubarose

Teach Ca$h 'n Gun$ to six children between the ages of 8 to 12 years old. Take side bets on how long before a gamer dad needs to intervene.

14 comments:

RK Fade said...

Or, same game with 5 children and Barnes. How long before Barnes throws a chair and a dad intervenes to get his child to safety?

Mr Skeletor said...

Does Barnes have tears streaming down his face as he throws the chair?

mtlawson said...

Oh man. Try teaching it to siblings (any age) and then watch the fireworks.

I shudder to think what would happen with my three.

--Mike L.

adrianbolt said...

Before I place my bet I need to know, are they Eurogamer kids or Ameritrash kids?

Pat H said...

Arm the dad with a plastic uzi that make alot of noise when you pull the trigger.

Michael Barnes said...

I never last long enough in a game of C&G to start crying...every fucking game, "Barnes is the cop!" on the first turn and I'm euthanized before I even get a chance to prove how I roll or keep it real as a noble member of the criminal fraternity. I cry afterwards, when I get home, softly into my pillow.

neonpeon said...

Haha...Man I gotta try this game.

ubarose said...

adrianbolt said...

Before I place my bet I need to know, are they Eurogamer kids or Ameritrash kids?


All children are Ameritrash kids. Their parents may tell you that their *gifted* child excels at Carcassonne and Caylus, but get that kid alone and ask them if they rather place farmers, and impress nobels, or if they want to kill monsters, and pay with wind up zombies and there is no doubt what they will answer.

Our little game of C'nG was actually running along quite smoothly until a certain sweet little 8 year old girl, who looked as if butter wouldn't melt in her mouth, turned to the little boy next to her and declared, "You suck! I'm goin' gee-had on your butt!"

adrianbolt said...

Great answer! That CnG game must have been a joy to watch/play.

It gives me the image that Eurosnoots are repressing their inner Ameritrasher; possibly why they come here and rant every so often.

I played Carcassone when it first came out and was unimpressed. Put hand in bag, place tile in obvious location, wait a few minutes while the other players thought hard. Rinse and repeat. Yet it's spawned many expansions... (Necessary to turn it into a good game?)

vandemonium said...


"You suck! I'm goin' gee-had on your butt!"


Best gaming quote ever! Awesome. I am stealing that for my own use immediately.

Michael Barnes said...

Probably my all-time favorite C&G moment was this time at my store when we were playing during Friday Night Magic...this kid, probably 12-13 years old wanted to play. He was a total bad ass. But anyway, it wound up with me pointing an airsoft SOCOM handgun (we tossed the foam ones)at his forehead and saying a bunch of awful, R-rated stuff that was going to happen if he didn't hit the deck. Then his mom walked in the door.

StephenAvery said...

I was playing Don Pepe with a younger player and his dad. His dad explained that his son might want to think more carefully about who he should eliminate to which he replied "I don't think. I just stab!"

Its now my official catch phrase...

notbillysparkles said...

I soooo can't wait until my daughter's old enough to play games.

My wife is the smart ass and I'm the potty mouth... it should make for some interesting one liners.

Speaking of which, a friend of mine was driving his kids home form a trip to Brome Park (a local, small sized amusement park) when his son, Brandon, 9 yearsold, suddenly excalaimed: "Daddy, I feel a disturbance in the force!"At which point he let rip a fart that would have put a 300 lbs trucker to shame.

Kids. Gotta love'em.

Ahsan said...

dude, gee-had. priceless.